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rae
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| Joined: | Thu Sep 11th, 2008 |
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Posted: Fri Sep 12th, 2008 05:20 am |
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My husband and I have been married for 28 yrs. We have 20 yr old twin girls who are away at college. My husband has been a gambler and has been very irresponsible over the years. I have had to bring home the bacon, and cook it too!
His friend Frank from work is a very nice widower. He is 49 I am 49 also! He has a 25 yr old son, who is married with a son of his own. I have known Frank for over 10 yrs now. I always thought he was a nice guy.Honestly, I never felt attracted to him, or anything until about 3 weeks ago. Something just clicked. He seems to like me, he has been flattering me, and not really flirting, but he comments on how lucky my husband is, and jokes around about if my husband should leave the picture, I will be all his! After all these yrs I am suddenly attracted to this man, and after all these yrs he seems attracted and interested in me. He never said these types of things, he touches my arm when he talks to me all of a sudden. Very weird!
His wife was a nice girl, she died about 7 yrs ago. He tends to meet controlling women, who don't treat him very nicely. He is a generous, kind man. I know it sounds silly, but could something really come of this situation? Why didn't I notice him sooner? What suddenly clicked? I have been praying for yrs for God and the angels to send a man my way who has been let down, I have been let down, and would love someone who appriciates me. Could this be Frank?
Rae-
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dee
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Posted: Fri Sep 12th, 2008 01:10 pm |
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Dear rae
the universe works in strange ways some times.....maybe Frank 'is' for you? The one important thing about being in a relationship is being a friend first...knowing that person on a friendship level first....and after knowing them for a 'long' time you see them in all their life's journey's,,,meaning you've seen this man through good times and bad....all situations and know him very well....to his core almost.....which is something ALOT of people don't see in a person until after they've invested their soul and it can be a couple years before you 'really' see someone in their true light......I'm not saying whether you should or shouldn't go for it......Have you thought much about 'leaving' your husband before now? think hard before giving that answer...look at your situation from all sides....there is a reason you suddenly 'feel' something? maybe it was meant to be? Maybe it comes now because you two are meant to be together? you've put the prayers out there....maybe now God IS sending the man to you...and before now the time wasn't right...I know from past experience that once you lose the 'spark' and all you can now feel is resentment that it may be too late to go back and sometimes you just can't go back or even see why you chose someone in the first place....so, think hard.....does this man really mean what he says when he is joking about being with you? Ask God...ask your guides and ask your angels....and ask them to be clear with their answers as to what your next step 'is meant' to be....sometimes when we reach this place in our lives it is a good time to have a reading done......I know someone who can do it....think about it.....don't make rash decisions. whether or not you are meant to be with Frank or not....think first about your husband....Do you want to leave him? If so....why have you hung in there till now? Why haven't you left him before now? this is a decision you should make without Frank even being a part of the picture....make that decision without Frank....make it for you. Because it is the right thing for you...not because you think you should be with someone else.....and I can also tell you that after being with someone for years....when I did leave the best times of my life were when I was alone....no partner in my life....I learned SO much about myself....deep inside of me...no men involved....You owe it to yourself to be true to you. In other words...don't leave your husband for another man...If you are to leave your husband be sure it is because it is what is best for you...and him
If it does come down to that...then maybe in the future you will bring Frank into your life....If you were to leave your husband...you will see for sure how Frank really feels about you....it's easy for people say one thing...but when it comes down to the nitty gritty....if he really feels that way...leaving your husband will show you just how much of his words are true......but also be prepared that if you were to leave your husband that maybe he wasn't 'really' being truthful....and didn't even know it? So, hope I've made some sort of sense to you? I'm praying that you find truth in your heart and a sense of peace of what your next step should be? we can only offer our thoughts and prayers.....but I give them to you with the utmost respect and love.....
take time with your decision...do what brings you peace of mind and peace to your soul
with much love Dee
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maureen5
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| Joined: | Sat Jun 21st, 2008 |
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Posted: Fri Sep 12th, 2008 04:04 pm |
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My thought is to deal with one situation at a time...First, the situation with your marriage. If you have tried everything to deal it, maybe you should leave the marriage. Don't leave for another person...leave for yourself.
Only after that situation is handled would I look at the new person. Don't muddle them together.
I was in a bad marriage for 28 years(I just noticed you have been married 28 years also.)...I would never have left, but he found a new person. It sounds strange, but i was relieved that he did it. I know I should have left much sooner...I was attached to my life, not to him.
Pray and be strong. Don't use the new person as a crutch to leave the old person.
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